this restart

so ive been absolutely MIA for a while now.

i don't know what to say at the moment cause i don't know how i feel exactly. so let me just tell you facts right now.

fact is, i dont have him anymore. he left me. and this time for real
fact is, i could get in a lot of trouble by police if i step over some boundaries
fact is, i haven't been to school in a week
fact is, i am so blank about what life has to offer me now
fact is, i realised i am so bad at being a person
fact is, i need help
fact is, i want help from him
fact is, i can't imagine life without him
fact is, i didn't know myself that i could become such a person because of him
fact is, i don't think i can get over him
fact is, i am less of a person without him
fact is, i know my friends thinks its the right choice but i still feel its the wrong

i dont know why i decided to write blogs again i guess i missed i missed having something that is mine that i control and that listens.

im sorry that its so morbid and sad the first time around and im sure it will be this way for along time. but still i write blankly, i dont think, i just type. and its like waves and crashes of words and emotions and i just let it be. cause all i can do now is let it be.

City and Colour - 'So Low'